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Rollercoaster

Updated: Oct 18, 2023

This post was written by my friend, Amberleigh Starr. She is a beautiful soul that strives to serve the Lord and be there for others, but she herself has an ongoing battle with her mental health. She and I have had many discussions about how we have gotten to where we are and where we are going. We sometimes struggle but we continue to get back up when we fall and live our lives the best we can. I am honored that she is my first guest blogger on this site and I hope that she knows just how much it means to me that she has chosen me to share her beautifully written words. She speaks so eloquently about the struggles with mental health that so many of us have endured but sometimes have a hard time expressing in the written word. So without further ado, I present to you, Amberleigh’s first blog post. 

Rollercoaster

When we hear the word rollercoaster we tend to get this feeling of going up and down around all these unknown turns. There is one thing that is true, some roller coasters are more enjoyable than others. Although this may seem silly I tend to relate mental health back to the idea of a roller coaster. In many ways they are similar, there are ups and downs, slow parts and fast parts, there are even the turns that you didn’t see coming. The big difference is that with mental health you don’t ever really get off the roller coaster, you just learn how to cope with these hills

and unexpected turns.


The idea and picture that I had for my life was a mix of bright colors that fit and flowed perfect together. Now if I look at the picture of my life those colors that flow together making a perfect picture are there but there are some dark lines, some scribbles over times that I try to block out of my mind but they will always be a small part of the picture. The picture might not look that beautiful to some but to me it shows the journey of joy, peace, hurt, struggles and strength. Although this picture of life is not what I thought mine would look like it is more than I could have ever imagined.

You probably are thinking how can life be more beautiful than you thought once you started down the initial hill on the roller coaster of mental health? I know that it seems crazy but this picture of my life is more beautiful because I have learned what strength is. This ride has been full of ups and downs but I honestly wouldn’t trade it for the perfect life I had pictured five years ago.

This picture of my life is more beautiful because I know what it is like to not want to take another step forward, what it is like to think there is no way out. I know what it is like to have to fight each morning to get out of bed and to make it through each day. But I also know how much joy comes from having a good day! I have learned that each day is a gift and that celebrating small victories is just as important as celebrating the big ones. The small ones are actually sometimes the most important victories. I have learned what it means to have a support system who is there for you no matter what to celebrate, encourage and support you on both the good days and bad days.

Don’t get me wrong mental health can be debilitating, there are days where I feel that it takes all of my energy just to get up in the morning. Honestly, though those are the days that I am more thankful for because I got another day to fight and to see some beauty from the pain.

Sometimes I can go months without feeling like I have to fight and then out of nowhere it shows up and it feels like the worst thing ever. I know that giving up sometimes feels like the best idea but I can promise that it isn’t. Even on the days when it feels like there is no hope there is some. I once was told by a friend, “The days you feel like you don’t have any hope, that’s okay because I will hold onto that hope until you can hold it again.” You don’t have to go through this alone.

I am not the same person I was five years ago, I am stronger than I even knew was possible. I know that my mental health will always be apart of me but I also know that it will not control me. It only has the power that I give it and each day I fight to give it less power. I know that I am able to get through the hard days, and that I am not alone because I have a support system who encourages me and points me to the truths.

Just like I said before, there are days that are harder than others but each day is worth the fight.No matter how you might feel you have immense value, and a purpose here. You are strong enough, good enough, so important! You are so loved and cared for and you are not alone! Remember that there is a light at the end of the tunnel and that you story is not over. You can overcome anything in this world, especially your mental health.

“Broken crayons still color,” so you, my friend, no matter how broken or stuck on the hill or unknown turn of the roller coaster you may feel you can get through it and there is something beautiful on the other side. You can do this!

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