Cafes, Chaos, and Culture Shock: Life in Spain So Far as an Expat

A well-earned complimentary drink after a delicious meal at @littlefoodandbeer.

My husband and I were wiped out, not exactly photo-ready, but honestly — moments like this are what it’s all about. Great food, good vibes, and that happy “we made it through the week” smile. 🍻✨

We Made It to Spain (and Wow, What a Ride)

Well, we made it! Phew—what a ride. I’m still recovering from that plane trip. It’s not like I didn’t expect chaos (because let’s be real, chaos follows me like glitter on a toddler’s craft project), but wow.

I told friends before we left that I’d finally exhale once we were strapped into that long European flight but that is definitely not how it unfolded.

But hey—we’re here. And now the real adventure begins.

The Restaurants 🍴

So, let’s start with the food, because priorities. I wasn’t sure what to expect in Spain. Full disclosure: I had never been here before we moved. Yep, sight unseen. Some people call that crazy; I call it desperate for a fresh start. Plus, I trusted my husband and oldest son after their scouting trip to Valencia.

And, okay fine, I also trusted ChatGPT to some point…which I don’t recommend. (Do your research, friends. No shade to AI, but let’s just say it’s not perfect. 😅)

I figured we’d just be eating paella on repeat, because doesn’t everyone? But then I saw rabbit on the menu, and—don’t come for me horse girl friends—horse is also an option here. Hard pass.

What I didn’t expect: the food scene here is amazing. In our neighborhood (Extramurs), you can walk five minutes in any direction and stumble upon:

• Two cafés ☕

• A bar (that also serves coffee, of course)

• A fruitería 🍊

• A bazaar

• At least two grocery stores

• A barber

• An English school

• And so many restaurants some are not even listed on google

So yeah, it’s not hard to find food. It’s hard to choose. And the price? Usually half--or even a third--of what we’d pay in the U.S. outside the city center. I'm not complaining one bit. And the pictures because of course i'm keeping a food diary to remind us where we got that Carbonara that I have been craving for weeks (true story...it was Il Veneto).

Peek at some of the yummy food above 😋 How I’ve lost 5 pounds instead of gained 15 is beyond me — I’m blaming all the walking and the lack of chemicals in the food here.

That last pic is the Carbonara from @IlVenetoValencia — and trust me, the photo doesn’t do it justice. The depth of flavor in that dish is unreal. It’s an absolute must if you’re ever in Valencia 🇪🇸✨

I can’t not talk about @LiaoPastel — hands down one of my favorite pastry spots in Valencia 🥐✨

Just 8 minutes from home, with cozy vibes, amazing coffee, and pastries that are almost too pretty to eat (almost 😋). Add this to your Valencia must-try list!

The Bureaucracy 🗂️

Okay, let’s talk paperwork because it is NOT all tapas and sunsets.

One word: patience.

Bring patience, bring a translation app, and maybe bring wine. Because Spain runs on rules that…don’t always match up. We’re on our fourth attempt to get our padrón (basically registering your address with the government). Every office has a slightly different story, and what worked for your neighbor might not work for you. Oh and so you know, it was actually the fifth attempt that got us our Padron, so yeah...

Pro tip: Same goes for bank accounts. You need an NIE number (foreigner ID), and getting one from outside Spain? Absolute circus. If you can, wait until you’re here to apply.

Honestly, if it weren’t for my husband Shannon’s patience, we’d be living in a cardboard box.

💡 Tip from me: I’ll be putting together step-by-step guides on the blog soon, so you don’t have to learn the hard way like we did.

Nothing says success like finally getting your padrón after five tries 😅🎉

We celebrated at @douxamer.centro, and honestly, it was the perfect choice. Beautiful presentation, amazing flavors, and a cozy spot right in the heart of Valencia — highly recommend if you need a little victory brunch!

The Views

Just wow. I can't talk about Valencia without talking about the historical views all around us. I actually really enjoy my little walks to the city. Every time I try to do my best to take it all in and yes, of course snap a picture or ten. And yet, I have yet to even begin to start to explore all that Valencia has to offer. Every time I am out I discover a new hidden pocket that I appreciate.

Just the other day I discovered this adorable coffee shop that was decorated in Halloween decor which is not very common here and the coffee and treats were perfecto. And it's. sofunny because the coffee shop was just seven minutes from my place yet, once again, I discovered another little hiddle pocket. I even brought Evelynn back to the area to look at a few stores that I had not seen yet, too. I wonder if there will come a time when I will not find new things all around me or if this is just how it is? So fun, I am not complaining.

There is beauty all around us along with culture, history and oh so many things to do and see.

The Metro Misadventures 🚇

Getting lost on the metro is practically a rite of passage. Add my terrible sense of direction + anxiety, and let’s just say: I’m walking…a LOT.

On the bright side, I’ve already lost five pounds. On the not-so-bright side, I’ve gone the wrong way on buses twice in a row and just gave up and walked 45 minutes home.

At one point, the bus driver literally communicated with another bus so they could both stop, and I could shuffle across the street like a lost puppy. Everyone watched as I got off one bus, crossed, and got on the other. Humbling.

Then I tried to scan my card wrong and a kind lady had to step in. There are good people out there.

And don’t get me started on grocery store rules. Apparently, the self-checkout is only for people with fewer than 10 items. Meanwhile, in the U.S., I’ve scanned $400 worth of groceries in one go, thinking that it can't be normal but what do I know. Different place, different rules. Takes some adjusting (and deep breaths).

Slowly figuring out the metro, and seriously, can this girl not look any sassier and more stylish? By the way, she goes by Evelynn now and not Aubrey ; )

The Smells 👃

This one’s tough.

My son Tristan is super sensitive to smells (remember the plane incident in my lost post), and yep--he got that from me. City life has been fun and vibrant, but the smells? Not great.

Dogs are everywhere (which I love!), but dogs pee. A lot. And it doesn’t rain much here, so…you get the idea. Add in unseasonably hot weather, old pipes, and centuries-old infrastructure, and it can be a lot for sensitive noses.

Recycling here is next-level — they even have a bin for organics, which is amazing, but that can also add to the smell factor.

And landlords? Let’s just say, they don’t always see what we see as “problems.” We’ve already had some adventures with smells in the apartment, and I’ll spare you the gory details. Pretty much making volcanoes in sink drains, Magyvering holes in the wall that go to the sewer, fun stuff like that.

The irony that the only pic of me is in front of trash is not lost on me. I did always love the Forkie character. This is right when you walk out of our apartment, the perks of living in the city--Trash and recycling front and center. ; )

The Rental Flop (Times Two) 🚗

One of the biggest reasons we moved to Europe was TRAVEL. Shannon and I talked about exploring Europe when we first met—24 years ago!—and now we’re finally here.

So naturally, we wanted to rent a car and take the kids somewhere epic--our first target: Fonts de l’Algar (stunning waterfalls).

Shannon goes to rent the car, only to be told he now needs an international driver’s license. Some places require it, some don’t—it depends on the office, the worker, and probably the alignment of the stars.

He came home defeated, so I rallied and pivoted to Plan B: the Museum of Illusions, Valencia. It was fun, but not exactly waterfalls and beautiful scenery. Grayson bailed (screens won that day). He needs lots of heads-up and verbal warnings before he commits to an adventure, most autistic families will understand this one.

The next week, we tried again. Still didn’t happen. More rules, more confusion, more defeated faces. The “phantom trips” have not been our shining parent moments.

Lesson learned: trains are your friend, but they require planning. Shannon will be getting an International driver's permit (I don't even want to attempt these roads just yet). Stay tuned—we’ll figure it out like we always do. Looking forward to lots of travel in the very near future.

Tristan at the Museum of Illusions, Valencia

Shannon and Evelynn at the Museum of Illusions

Tristan and Evelynn at the Museum of Illusions, Valencia

The Illusions Museum was more of an hour-and-a-half adventure than a full-day outing—and yes, we may have temporarily misplaced a kid in the process 😅. But it was totally worth it! We had such a fun time exploring all the mind-bending exhibits. Here are just a few of our favorite photos (and this isn’t even all of them!). It’s only about a ten-minute walk from our place, so if you’re visiting Valencia, definitely check it out!

📍@MuseumOfIllusionsValencia

Final Thoughts 💭 s

Spain has been beautiful, frustrating, delicious, confusing, and humbling—all in just a few weeks.

We’ve had chaos, flops, and smells we’d rather not talk about. But we’ve also had amazing food, kind strangers, and glimpses of the life we dreamed about when we decided to move here.

If you’re thinking about doing something wild like moving to another country: know that it’s messy. But it’s also worth it.

And hey—I’ll keep sharing the chaos, the lessons, and yes, the Manda Moments—so you don’t have to make all the same mistakes we did. 😉

👉 PS: I’ll soon be offering a subscription service where you can get my real-life tips and tricks for navigating Spain—things like how to set up your padrón without losing your mind, what you actually need for a Spanish bank account, and how to survive your first week without a car. Think of it as the behind-the-scenes guide I wish I had when we landed here.

Thanks for following along on this journey. Until next time...